CD7, Future Oc.to.mom

Unexpected results today. Apparently, I'm a good responder to gonal-f. Too good. I had a lot of follicles. 5 on my right and, like, 8 on my left. I have a 15mm, a 14mm, a 13mm, a few 12mm, and then a few smaller than that. The first thing the doctor said to me was that if we did an IUI this cycle I'd have a high risk of multiples.

"How do you feel about that?" she asked.

I laughed.

I had to. I mean, come on. No one wants to be the next octo.mom. To be completely honest, I don't even want twins. If it came down to a choice of never having children ever or twins, I'd take the twins, in a heartbeat, but I would really really prefer just one. For now. And DH agrees, even more strongly than I do. But, then again, I really really want to get pregnant, and there was a part of me (there still is) that was giddy with excitement over so many follicles. Just giddy. Ugh.

So, my options at this point are:

• Cancel the cycle
• Go forward with IUI with higher than average risk of multiples
• Convert to IVF

Yes, convert to IVF. I didn't even know you could do that. But the doctor told me that with the number of follicles I already have, yes, absolutely, I could totally 100% do IVF. She didn't even blink.

Now, confession, I've had a sneaky suspicion for a while that we would end up at IVF eventually. I don't know why. My infertility is currently in the "unexplained" category, but I have a suspicion that endometriosis is my problem (or one of my problems) and my RE told me (although I have not heard this elsewhere) that IUI generally does not work for women with endo, but that IVF does. So, anyway, I'm totally okay with IVF, I have already become comfortable with the idea that that's where we might find ourselves eventually, and, honestly, I like the success rates of IVF when compared with IUI. Sure, they're not 100%, but I'll take 40-50% over 15% any day.

But, I'm covered for IUI, and not for IVF. I only have a ballpark of what IVF would cost me, and it's not cheap: $6500 - $8000, but I'm okay with the expense. (A couple years ago I had to have a bridge replaced by two crowns, which required a tooth extraction, two posts and two caps, with the total bill eventually coming to over $11,000, and I figure if I can spend that much on 2 stupid teeth, I can spend it to get a baby.) And we do have the money.

But, I don't like being put in the position of having to decide mid-cycle. And it just seems like really soon to be already going the IVF route. I have to go back on Wednesday to check my progress, but until then I have a few options. If I want to do IVF, they've suggested that I get ganirelix today in order to make sure I don't ovulate too soon, and continue doing 150iu of gonal-f today and tomorrow. If I don't want to do IVF, I've been advised to cut down the gonal-f to 75iu today and tomorrow, no ganirelix.

Oh, and I called my insurance company to find out if I'm covered for reduction in case of a multiple pregnancy (the doctor advised me to find this out), and I'm not, but they also told me that I'm not covered for IUI, which I am. At least I think I am. My RE says that I am, and I haven't gotten a bill from the last one, but now I'm afraid that I'm actually not covered. I didn't push the issue with my insurance company because now I'm thinking that maybe, technically, I'm not covered, but somehow I've slipped through, but if I make an issue of it then they'll realize that they've been covering me for something that I'm actually not covered for... geez!!

The easiest thing to do would be to just cancel this cycle and hope that an adjustment in the dosage next cycle will prevent this from happening again. But, who wants to ever cancel a cycle?

So, I don't know what I'm going to do.