We're going to continue with IUI, but it sounds like my RE wants to do at most only 2 more IUI cycles, then move on to IVF, I guess. Oh, and I still haven't gotten AF, so he said it would be best to do another blood test, just in case. Way to get my hopes up, again. And of course it's 6:30 now and they still haven't called me with the results. But I know it's going to be negative, unless being pregnant feels like you're about to get your period any second.
BFN. Mentally, logically, I wasn't surprised, and I took it rather well when I got the call. I think emotionally, though, I was surprised, although it took a while to register. I was still clinging to hope, and so about an hour after the call I felt, well, a little devastated. This was our first IUI and somehow, although I knew that IUI really doesn't increase your chances much, I thought that IUI would be some sort of magic bullet that couldn't possibly fail, right? We had tried so hard. BD the day before and the day after the IUI - and I had 2 mature follicles. What could possibly go wrong?
Also, I think what made it even more difficult was that we won't be able to get right back on the horse, so to speak, because we'll be out of town for part of this month and won't be able to have an assisted cycle. We may try naturally if our schedules permit, but that is also not so likely, so probably we're taking a month off.
Anyway, after to coming to terms with the fact that we'd failed once again, but that it didn't mean that we wouldn't keep trying, and it didn't mean we would fail forever, I picked myself up and brushed myself off and today I feel pretty okay.
My RE asked for me to come in tomorrow to "talk about where to go from here." Not quite sure what he means by that, but okay. I assumed we'd just do at least 2 or 3 more IUIs before discussing "other options," so we'll see what he has in mind. For this cycle he had considered putting me on gonal, which I really don't know anything about. It's an injectable, right? How is it better or different than femara or clomid? It certainly costs more, which is why I balked at starting it for this past cycle. I think it was going to be something like $1600, after insurance.
So, I'll update after my appointment tomorrow but most likely I won't have much for the remainder of this month, although I will be temping regularly (unlike for my last 3 cycles), just to see what my body's reaction is to the clomid and femara and triggers and progesterone, etc.
Went in at 11am for my beta. It's ten after 6 now and I'm still waiting for my phone call. I know it will probably be negative bcause of the HPT BFN yesterday morning... but I did a search on FF for charts with "negative HPT before positive HPT" and "late HPT+ (>15dpo)" and came up with lots of matching charts, lots of women who had gotten negatives at 13 and even 14dpo, then a positive a few days later.
If there is one thing a woman who is TTC can do well, it's hold on to hope.
How long do most women have to wait to find out the results of their beta?
My hope is that I will not have this blog very long. That doesn't jinx it does it?
My husband and I have bee TTC for 10 months. I'm 34 and he's 49. We've been together for 7 years and now I regret having waited so long... like a lot of people I guess I felt like we had all the time in the world. I had heard that women's fertility starts to decline after 35, so up until 33 I felt no pressure and then when my 34th birthday was approaching I suddenly could see that ticking clock and I sat my husband down and told him we needed to get going on this thing. Maybe that's part of my problem. As soon as I decided it was time, IT WAS TIME. Now, ten months later... well, that's why I've started this blog. Because it's already taken longer than I'd hoped and I'm tired of keeping it all inside. Besides my husband no one else knows we're trying. And I have a hard time even talking to my husband about how hard this has been for me so far.
We still don't know if there is anything actually wrong with us. My husband has been tested and he got an A+. All the tests for me have come back fine. My husband just thinks our timing is off, but I've been using OPK since month 1 (from the beginning I was serious about success) and have been charting since month 3, so I don't know how much better we could do on the timing. But I have read that there is only a 12 to 24 hour window after you ovulate, so in that case maybe our timing has been off.
Anyway, I'm on CD 27. Took an HPT this morning: BFN. Go for beta tomorrow but I'm not hopeful after the BFN (I'm 13 DPO today, so I know technically the HPT still could be negative because it's still early, but we all know most women would get BFP at 13 DPO if they were pregnant).
So, that's it for now. Will post results of beta tomorrow.
I'm 35, DH is 50. We have been TTC #1 since November 2008. So far we are in the "unexplained infertility" category. We failed IUI #4 in March 2010, and, after a 4 month break from treatments, we had our first (unsuccessful) IVF in Aug/Sept 2010. We are now hoping to get into an IVF study (free IVF!) in Nov/Dec 2010.
May 2009: Spoke to my OB/GYN about TTC for 6 months with no luck. He gave me clomid prescription and told me he'd refer me to RE if we didn't have success after a few months.
June 2009: First clomid cycle, unmonitored. Pain and cramping at ovulation. I decided that I would see a fertility specialist sooner rather than later - I have had cysts before and was afraid that maybe that's where my pain was coming from. BFN
July 2009: Met with RE. HSG test = all clear. SA = all good. Did another clomid cycle (100mg/day for 5 days), this time monitored. Ovidrel trigger, progesterone suppositories. Thin lining (found out later). 2 follicles, one 20.7mm, the other 15.6mm. Triggered on CD12. Beta was positive at 9dpo (HCG=9), negative at 12dpo (HCG=2). I think it was a false positive due to the HCG trigger, and doing the beta so early (!?). My RE said "I don't think so, but anything's possible." End result - BFN
August 2009: Cyst on my ovary; doctor said we'd have to skip a cycle (we tried naturally, BFN).
September 2009: First femara (5mg/day for 5 days) cycle (clomid caused visual disturbances), IUI#1. Ovidrel trigger, progesterone suppositories. Thin lining (found out later). 2 follicles: 18mm and 21mm. Triggered CD13. Had pain and cramping in the days after ovulation. Doctor said this was probably just "strong ovulation." BFN
October 2009: Took cycle off due to travel.
November 2009: Supposed to do IUI#2, but RE prescribed month off and "estrogen priming" to "quiet things down" before doing injectables next month. Tried on our own - BFN.
December 2009: IUI#2 with injectables (gonal-f), ovidrel trigger, prometrium. Thin (6.5mm) lining. 15 follicles over 10mm on CD9, and 5 that are between 15-16mm (after 6 days of 150iu gonal-f); considered switching to IVF, but instead triggered on CD10, IUI on CD12. BFN
Dec 2009-Jan 2010: 10 days of BCPs to shrink leftover follicles
January 2010: IUI #3 with injectables (gonal-f), estrogen patch CD2-15, ovidrel trigger, endometrin. Good lining this time (9.5mm). Started at 75iu of gonal-f/day (CD4) instead of 150iu and ended up having to stim for 14 days to get a mature follicle (the last 3 days at 112.5iu/day). One mature follicle at 24mm. Other smaller follicles were 12mm or smaller. Trigger CD20, IUI CD21. Short LP (12 days). BFN
February 2010: IUI #4 with injectables. BFN.
March 2010-July 2010: 4 un-medicated cycles before we move on to IVF. All BFNs.
August-September 2010: First IVF cycle. Start lupron (10 units) on cycle day 21, then "lupron period," then stims starting on CD3. 150 units gonal-f, 2 vials menopur per day (lupron down to 5 units/day). Stim for 10 days, trigger CD12, retrieval CD14. 17 eggs retrieved, 14 mature, 6 fertilized normally. On day 3 we have 4 embryos left and we transfer 3 "fair to good" quality embryos (one 6 cell and two 5 cell). BFN