No more IUIs. IVF is next.
I'm having a hard time. I'm in a dark place right now.
I will probably take a break from blogging for a while.
I just want to have a family... why does it have to be so hard?
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Trying to stay hopeful (while not getting my hopes up) since November 2008
(Click to See My Fertility Chart)
About Me
- Jane
- New York, NY
- I'm 35, DH is 50. We have been TTC #1 since November 2008. So far we are in the "unexplained infertility" category. We failed IUI #4 in March 2010, and, after a 4 month break from treatments, we had our first (unsuccessful) IVF in Aug/Sept 2010. We are now hoping to get into an IVF study (free IVF!) in Nov/Dec 2010.
My Email
ttchopeful at gmail
Blog Archive
Our Journey So Far...
November 2008: Began TTC. For the first 2 cycles I used OPK but did not chart.
January 2009: Started charting with Fertility Friend.
May 2009: Spoke to my OB/GYN about TTC for 6 months with no luck. He gave me clomid prescription and told me he'd refer me to RE if we didn't have success after a few months.
June 2009: First clomid cycle, unmonitored. Pain and cramping at ovulation. I decided that I would see a fertility specialist sooner rather than later - I have had cysts before and was afraid that maybe that's where my pain was coming from. BFN
July 2009: Met with RE. HSG test = all clear. SA = all good. Did another clomid cycle (100mg/day for 5 days), this time monitored. Ovidrel trigger, progesterone suppositories. Thin lining (found out later). 2 follicles, one 20.7mm, the other 15.6mm. Triggered on CD12. Beta was positive at 9dpo (HCG=9), negative at 12dpo (HCG=2). I think it was a false positive due to the HCG trigger, and doing the beta so early (!?). My RE said "I don't think so, but anything's possible." End result - BFN
August 2009: Cyst on my ovary; doctor said we'd have to skip a cycle (we tried naturally, BFN).
September 2009: First femara (5mg/day for 5 days) cycle (clomid caused visual disturbances), IUI#1. Ovidrel trigger, progesterone suppositories. Thin lining (found out later). 2 follicles: 18mm and 21mm. Triggered CD13. Had pain and cramping in the days after ovulation. Doctor said this was probably just "strong ovulation." BFN
October 2009: Took cycle off due to travel.
November 2009: Supposed to do IUI#2, but RE prescribed month off and "estrogen priming" to "quiet things down" before doing injectables next month. Tried on our own - BFN.
December 2009: IUI#2 with injectables (gonal-f), ovidrel trigger, prometrium. Thin (6.5mm) lining. 15 follicles over 10mm on CD9, and 5 that are between 15-16mm (after 6 days of 150iu gonal-f); considered switching to IVF, but instead triggered on CD10, IUI on CD12. BFN
Dec 2009-Jan 2010: 10 days of BCPs to shrink leftover follicles
January 2010: IUI #3 with injectables (gonal-f), estrogen patch CD2-15, ovidrel trigger, endometrin. Good lining this time (9.5mm). Started at 75iu of gonal-f/day (CD4) instead of 150iu and ended up having to stim for 14 days to get a mature follicle (the last 3 days at 112.5iu/day). One mature follicle at 24mm. Other smaller follicles were 12mm or smaller. Trigger CD20, IUI CD21. Short LP (12 days). BFN
February 2010: IUI #4 with injectables. BFN.
March 2010-July 2010: 4 un-medicated cycles before we move on to IVF. All BFNs.
August-September 2010: First IVF cycle. Start lupron (10 units) on cycle day 21, then "lupron period," then stims starting on CD3. 150 units gonal-f, 2 vials menopur per day (lupron down to 5 units/day). Stim for 10 days, trigger CD12, retrieval CD14. 17 eggs retrieved, 14 mature, 6 fertilized normally. On day 3 we have 4 embryos left and we transfer 3 "fair to good" quality embryos (one 6 cell and two 5 cell). BFN
January 2009: Started charting with Fertility Friend.
May 2009: Spoke to my OB/GYN about TTC for 6 months with no luck. He gave me clomid prescription and told me he'd refer me to RE if we didn't have success after a few months.
June 2009: First clomid cycle, unmonitored. Pain and cramping at ovulation. I decided that I would see a fertility specialist sooner rather than later - I have had cysts before and was afraid that maybe that's where my pain was coming from. BFN
July 2009: Met with RE. HSG test = all clear. SA = all good. Did another clomid cycle (100mg/day for 5 days), this time monitored. Ovidrel trigger, progesterone suppositories. Thin lining (found out later). 2 follicles, one 20.7mm, the other 15.6mm. Triggered on CD12. Beta was positive at 9dpo (HCG=9), negative at 12dpo (HCG=2). I think it was a false positive due to the HCG trigger, and doing the beta so early (!?). My RE said "I don't think so, but anything's possible." End result - BFN
August 2009: Cyst on my ovary; doctor said we'd have to skip a cycle (we tried naturally, BFN).
September 2009: First femara (5mg/day for 5 days) cycle (clomid caused visual disturbances), IUI#1. Ovidrel trigger, progesterone suppositories. Thin lining (found out later). 2 follicles: 18mm and 21mm. Triggered CD13. Had pain and cramping in the days after ovulation. Doctor said this was probably just "strong ovulation." BFN
October 2009: Took cycle off due to travel.
November 2009: Supposed to do IUI#2, but RE prescribed month off and "estrogen priming" to "quiet things down" before doing injectables next month. Tried on our own - BFN.
December 2009: IUI#2 with injectables (gonal-f), ovidrel trigger, prometrium. Thin (6.5mm) lining. 15 follicles over 10mm on CD9, and 5 that are between 15-16mm (after 6 days of 150iu gonal-f); considered switching to IVF, but instead triggered on CD10, IUI on CD12. BFN
Dec 2009-Jan 2010: 10 days of BCPs to shrink leftover follicles
January 2010: IUI #3 with injectables (gonal-f), estrogen patch CD2-15, ovidrel trigger, endometrin. Good lining this time (9.5mm). Started at 75iu of gonal-f/day (CD4) instead of 150iu and ended up having to stim for 14 days to get a mature follicle (the last 3 days at 112.5iu/day). One mature follicle at 24mm. Other smaller follicles were 12mm or smaller. Trigger CD20, IUI CD21. Short LP (12 days). BFN
February 2010: IUI #4 with injectables. BFN.
March 2010-July 2010: 4 un-medicated cycles before we move on to IVF. All BFNs.
August-September 2010: First IVF cycle. Start lupron (10 units) on cycle day 21, then "lupron period," then stims starting on CD3. 150 units gonal-f, 2 vials menopur per day (lupron down to 5 units/day). Stim for 10 days, trigger CD12, retrieval CD14. 17 eggs retrieved, 14 mature, 6 fertilized normally. On day 3 we have 4 embryos left and we transfer 3 "fair to good" quality embryos (one 6 cell and two 5 cell). BFN
Followers
My Blog List
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No Womb For Improvement9 years ago
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OMG WhereTF HAVE I BEEN?9 years ago
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Moving AGAIN, sorry9 years ago
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Doesn't feel real….9 years ago
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Wow!9 years ago
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6 Month Update9 years ago
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Merry Christmas!9 years ago
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A Third Miracle10 years ago
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A little check in!10 years ago
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Hello, It's Me10 years ago
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Two Years, Six(ish) Months10 years ago
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Kindergarten10 years ago
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Ellie Became a BIG Sister!10 years ago
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A Brief Update10 years ago
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STARTING FRESH10 years ago
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Epilogue10 years ago
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Oh, Mother's Day10 years ago
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Teach Me to Teach You10 years ago
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Finally...an update at 23 weeks10 years ago
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Thankful11 years ago
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Strep and antibiotics and hives! Oh my!11 years ago
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It Is Finished.11 years ago
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37 Week Comparison11 years ago
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marlazampesti11 years ago
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As we predicted11 years ago
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Oh blech11 years ago
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5w6d by U/S11 years ago
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Pregnant with #2!11 years ago
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6 months later...11 years ago
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a Long awaited update12 years ago
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Hello out there...12 years ago
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Hello from the 2.5 year olds! :)12 years ago
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Final12 years ago
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So.....What Happens Now?12 years ago
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Silent All These Years12 years ago
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The New Phase of Embryo Biopsy and PGD12 years ago
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I peed on a stick today12 years ago
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Where are we?12 years ago
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9 months old: Favourite moments12 years ago
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Oh hi there!12 years ago
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Alright, alright, alright12 years ago
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Fare thee well, Blogger.12 years ago
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Hihi!12 years ago
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Day By Day13 years ago
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I'm THAT woman.13 years ago
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Our new normal13 years ago
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Relocating13 years ago
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Letter to my donor13 years ago
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Blog Closed13 years ago
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Our Story, part 1.13 years ago
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year one in pictures13 years ago
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Resurfacing13 years ago
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Closing13 years ago
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Our Birth Story14 years ago
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You Won't Believe This14 years ago
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oh girl I wish I new the answer to that, its all I want too!
ReplyDeleteplease don't take too long of a break, we will miss you!
I'm so very sorry. (((Hugs)))
ReplyDeleteI'm so very sorry. Thinking about you.
ReplyDeleteI am so sorry. Take all the time you need...we'll be here to support you when you get back. Take care.
ReplyDeleteI am in the same boat as you. we all but gave up in october after 7 iui's. we are going to start our ivf journey on tuesday. i am here if you need an ear. sorry. it sucks!
ReplyDeleteJane,
ReplyDeleteI'm so sorry. We're here for you, let us know if you need anything. take care.
I'm sorry, it's so hard to stay positive when all we get is negatives. I hope you get your mojo back and find the strength to get through this. BIG HUGS
ReplyDeleteI'm really sorry.
ReplyDeleteWhat a heartbreaking ordeal you must be going through. Taking the IVF plunge brings so much baggage with it, and you must just be worn down after all the IUI failures. Still, hope will renew itself and you will be ready to move on, and you WILL have a family, one way or another. You just get to suffer a lot first. Hope to see you again when you're ready.
ReplyDeleteOh, Jane, I'm so sorry! I hate that your next step is IVF. *thinking of you*
ReplyDeleteI'm so sorry. I wish I knew why it had to be so hard. I really do. Giant ((hugs)).
ReplyDeleteI'm so, so, sorry. (((hugs)))
ReplyDeleteHuge hugs from me. I am so sorry. It was supposed to work this time. What a crushing blow. (((hugs))) Thinking of you.
ReplyDeleteI am so so sorry. No answer on the hard part...it sucks! Thinking of you. ((HUGS))
ReplyDeleteI've been thinking about you hun, I'm so so sorry about the BFN. I totally know how you feel right now, its a scary and sucky dark lonely place. Take all the time you need, and know we'll be here waiting for you whenever you're ready.
ReplyDeleteI'm so sorry. It is so frustrating and isolating. Just know that we have all been there and can lend our support when you need it.
ReplyDelete